I’m a mom. I think it’s the biggest most important job I have. I love my motorcycle man because he helps to remind me of really important things. You see last night as he cut the raw chicken into strips for fajitas, I chopped the onions and peppers. I mentioned to him that I skipped tanning. That sounds strange I’m sure tanning, the red haired freckled Pippi Longstocking look alike tans?? Let me just explain a little about the tanning. My tanning salon has something called red light treatment; it helps people with a number of conditions, eczema being one of them. So I try my darndest to fit in a session every single day if possible. It’s not as easy as it sounds.
So he asks me “why?” (me) “well my sister she left her ipad here and so I had to come straight home and make sure the house was unlocked so she could get in, then while I was here I decided to do the dishes, and clear off the table, and strip our sheets, water the garden and did a quick blog entry. Before I knew it, it was time to get Dylan (Let me tell you. I can get stuff done FAST when I put my mind to it, I think it’s a MOM SUPER POWER) So…then I picked up Dylan, then I picked up Abbie, then I went to the grocery store to get the stuff for our fajita’s and when I got back, I vacuumed and I snuck in an episode of Mad Men and then…well before I knew it, it was time to make dinner……so I didn’t tan today.” Rich replies, “The tanning place is right next to Fresh and Easy, why didn’t you just take Abbie and go while you were there in the same parking lot?” (me) “well Abbie hates sitting in the waiting room waiting for me, so I didn’t want to torture her again” He so quickly could tell me what was going on here. “You put your sister and your daughter’s needs before your own, like you always do. Everyone else is always so much more important than you. It wouldn’t have killed Abbie to sit there for 20 minutes; you could have just opened the slider for your sister and been back on your way.” He makes it all so black and white and it all makes such perfect sense when he explains it. I really took a pause for a moment. This goes hand in hand with the class I’m taking. I’m (learning) how to change this about me. It’s not easy, it feels so natural to me to put everyone’s needs in front of my own, isn’t that what we are supposed to do? This is not easy, this is really hard but I have to change my way of thinking. I’m not aiming to become a SELFISH crazy woman but you know….balance.
This year my word was LOVE. It’s a powerful packed word that can change the world. The biggest, strongest word I know but next year I think my word should be CHANGE. It will take action and courage but that’s what we are here for….. growth. If we don’t change how can we grow? Reminds me of a really great song by JJ Heller. And strangest thing….change is our word this week in Now You Workshop.
How many of you have been in this similar dilemma? oh and remember to vote. I’m keeping voting open for one week. Just look for the post that is titled VOTE!