wall flower

This week has been considerably busy feeling.  Filled to the brim for sure.  Tonight I actually get to stay home and rest a little.  I’m completely looking forward to that.  Below are just a few images from the last couple days.

IMG_0897 IMG_0937 IMG_0941 IMG_0954 IMG_0955 IMG_0968

It really shouldn’t surprise me that my little mini me is very much like me in lots of ways but in particular the shy way.  I had the pleasure of going to her church group last night to join in on their spa night.  I couldn’t help but notice that even though I was there, Abbie sat against the wall and nobody paid any attention to her,  not even so much as a hello.  The past few weeks when she gets into the car I will say something like “so how was friends?  (that’s the name of the group) do you have any girls you hang out with?” Each week she will say “It was good but I don’t really know anyone” She is so shy she is nervous to approach a group of girls.  The largest group of girls seem to know each other very well, as if they almost grew up together, with a few tinier groups of girls who seem a little shy but have already found their comfort nitch.  I was especially surprised in a room with say at least 4 other leaders that this had not been noticed.  We sat down to eat some snacks and I got to talking to another really sweet mom and she also included Abbie in our conversation.  Abbie volunteered that she was in Sunday school with this gal’s daughter.  That lit up the sweet lady and she called her daughter over and said “Abbie is in your Sunday school class!” that was about it for a while.  After we polished our nails Abbie asked if we could leave early.  My heart ached for her.  I had no idea that week after week she was feeling so alone in a room full of people.  We stepped outside for some fresh air when the sweet lady appeared again with her daughter and another darling girl; they also wanted some fresh air and didn’t seem to care about all the spa stuff going on inside the classroom. I mentioned to the lady that Abbie was feeling a little left out all these weeks and had no friends.  She immediately introduced Abbie to her daughter again and the other little girl.  They were very sweet to Abbie and began to ask her questions and before long they seemed to be getting along really well, so well that Abbie left my side to be with the girls.  I’m very thankful we didn’t leave early, I’m very grateful for the sweet lady I met last night who solved the problem rather quickly and also explained to me that when she grew up in the Philippines that she was very tall and skinny compared to most the tiny Filipino girls in her country and because of that she was made fun of and she was extremely shy and just would sit up against the walls.  She told me she only spoke when spoken to and her questions were always short.  She understood my littlest and only girl and she didn’t want her to feel like she felt when she was a kid.  This wonderful lady made my night.  I was so glad I went and I’m so glad Abbie now has some new friends. Not only did Abbie make a few new friends I also made a new friend last night, even exchanged telephone numbers. The night ended well.  God is so good, what could have left a very bad taste in our mouth was saved by one courageous lady who was brave enough to approach the outsiders and make them feel comfortable. She listened to the tugging in her heart, she paid attention to the Holy Spirit and she was lead to us.  It’s amazing how just one person can make all the difference.   I have to be honest when I say; judgment in reverse is a problem of mine.  I “expect” that since we are in a Christian environment that all the girls will be sweet and kind and that the leaders will lead and make all the girls feel included.  I keep learning in life that expecting always leads to disappointment and judgment is for God not me.  It’s amazing to me that I keep getting lesson after lesson, I wonder how many more lessons I need to learn?  I trust God though completely and I know all these things that happen make us into the people we are meant to be.

 Meet the littlest and only girls new friends.


4 thoughts on “wall flower

  1. Oh wow Tracie, I nearly left a comment on my other page about Jess and her start to school as to why we are not quote blog ready. Jess is so like Abbie. And I’m afraid it’s probably my fault. Again, another good reason for our blog. She was in tears on Tuesday night (first day of school) because the group of girls at school she so wants to belong to didn’t want to include her. She cried and cried and asked why can’t she just stay with me because I’m her best friend. I cried too of course. I ask the same questions “How were the other girls today?” “Who did you spend time with today?” And I quite often get “no-one” as the answer. It breaks my heart too. I know one day she will just find that kindred spirit. She had friends, but they are little girls and can be cruel sometimes. I don’t think they are those life long friends yet. There are some great mums in our circle too, but I tend to stand back on the outer too. Reading this really pulled at my heartstrings this morning. I’m glad Abbie made these new friends and hope they are good ones.

  2. thank you for sharing this. . . how you sifted through some of your own emotions while abbie was dealing with her own. we have so much to learn from our experiences with our daughters. and yes, often times it takes one person to make all the difference. . .

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