spring

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We took a small trip to the desert this weekend. Worth the trip don’t you think?  All along the ride there were small desert flowers at the side of the road, and the cactus with the vibrant pink flowers were ready to explode.  While these bushes filled with yellow flowers were scattered about.  The birds were singing and the desert was blooming. I was glad to visit.  A long time ago I didn’t like the desert.  I was naive.  I just thought it was dry, dirt and had little to offer.  Thank goodness as I have added years I realize it’s gorgeous.  Many of the plants remind me of under the sea.  It’s really quote beautiful the brown and the blue. I’m so happy we get wiser as we age.  It’s an upside.

spring and remembering

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I have not had a chance to look into making my blog a dot.org  but in the meantime.  I had a productive spring weekend.  What happened?

I painted a bookcase yellow

A chocolate cake was baked

We found the sweet blue eggs that are waiting to hatch

I planted the wild flowers for Aunt Louise

The yard was mowed

Good food was eaten

A little Laundry was done

Motorcycle man got a ride or two in

The jeep was smogged and tags paid

We listened

We prayed

We lived another day

And this week I hope to share with you, or anyone who cares to see… how the bookcase is coming along.  Totally free, completely useful and motorcycle man said “you made it look pretty” and that made me happy.

Here is my Sunday video.  A little slow and melancholy because it was dedicated to my great Aunt who left us in the fall and today we planted her wild flowers in hopes that they will bloom.  The secret word for my video…..is…..      love

GREEN straws and GOOD people

“By supporting our unique community you have participated in something amazing! You connected with a person & TRUSTED them to bring you something to enrich your life!”   this was the message

When I got home from work today and after picking up Moon Rebel, there were two packages sitting in my kitchen.  One , the oils I ordered for my mom and two, an unknown big brown box, mighty big box for what I found inside.  It came from a place in Newport Beach, “hey, that’s not too far from me!” The company, “Simply Straws”  Inside the box and wrapped carefully in lots of brown paper was a glass mug, a jar mug, with a lid and hole for a straw and a glass straw.  I have never drank out a glass straw before!  I had made juice this morning for breakfast for me and first-born and I thought…why not make a second batch so I can drink out of this amazing mug.  And so I did.

I rinsed my produce first.

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then I poured it into my new really cool mug (it fit perfect). thank you simply straws and thank you mystery friend!  I may have an inkling who they may be…just maybe??  Did I mention I love to drink my juice from straws and now I can stop using the plastic straws I buy and my sweet friend Miss Moonspinner recently gave me a straw cleaner.  This will be just perfect.

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I’m going to be painting my book-case today so I will be busy but I just wanted to share the good news.  That the community in which I belong to is very kind, very big-hearted and I’m very thankful for them.  I think my juice tastes better this way in this cool mug with the glass straw.  Yep, I’m sure of it.

Lastly I have been researching how to move my blog to a .org so I can have more control.  I wanted to give plug-ins a try today and realized because I use a .com with wordpress, I can’t use plug-ins.  And in case you are wondering what plug-ins are, welp, I don’t really know exactly.  It all started because I wanted to add that little pin on my pictures that you click on it and pin photo’s to pinterest.  I need a plug-in for that.  So today I will also be researching what that really means and how to possibly move my blog so I can make it more my own.  I think it’s time.

do you believe in yourself?

I have been doing a lot of reading and researching.  I think its part of mid-life. Questioning, where I am, how I got here and what’s in the future for me, for our family. I have been reading Dr. Phil’s book, “Self Matters” I’m in the chapter where he has one thinking about the defining events in your life. We can’t possibly remember every single day but there have been some events in our lives that stand out. I thought of a handful of personal and violating things that have happened in my life. I’m not going to share in this space but I will share the few things that came forward that are good. These events are times in my life where someone believed in me even when I didn’t believe in myself and turns out…they were right about me.

SHINEWhen I was in the first grade I was very shy, a lot like I’m still shy today. I had this teacher that really, really believed in me. She was going to have her class put on a play for their parents and she had to pick a part for all her kids. She chose me, the shyest girl in the class to play the starring roll. I had lines to memorize that my mom helped me with and when the big day came, I shined. I don’t think anyone would ever know I was the most shy, most quiet girl in the class. I don’t even remember being nervous that day. I know I was very young…but I remember. My teacher had full confidence in me.

ME AND RON

When I was in high school I took art class. I had the same teacher for art as I had for yearbook staff. I thought it strange but when I was in her art class she would tell me I could do whatever I wanted and I didn’t have to do the class assignments. She said she believed in what I had in my head and what I could do with it. I just thought it was because she liked me. I didn’t pursue my talent in art. I stopped drawing and painting by the time I was 19. But she saw something in me. I will never forget that.dont give up

When I was a young married women I went back to college for a time and took a writing class. I love to write. I remember a few weeks in we had a writing assignment. I wrote about Vietnam and I used my father-n-law as my inspiration. My paper was picked and read aloud to the class. She asked the class who they thought wrote the piece. Nobody guessed it was the shy girl with red hair that sat in the back. They all seemed pleasantly surprised and I was noticed that night and received a handful of really nice compliments.

portraitLooking back on some of my inspiring memories, I realize all 3 were TEACHERS who had faith in me. Do we give our teachers the credit they deserve? They shape our lives. Not all teachers are good but some are really great. I’m thankful for these teachers who had faith in me. Now to bottle their faith and make it my own. This is my challenge.

find your inspiration

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I’m inspired in many different ways and I think my top inspiration is through nature but a very close second are people. People inspire me. I’m very shy. I’m an introvert but that being said. I love people and I especially love group projects. Currently I’m in a year-long video time capsule making course. I like to brag about my teacher Xanthe because she is really great and yes, inspiring but on top of that, my creative classmates are co-inspirers. I love to watch the video’s my class mates make and most recently I watched one made by Julia  and she shared a day with her friend via video time capsule and her friend was beach combing and found bits of trash and interesting things and made art out of it. Then via her video and in the comments another classmate who equally inspires me had an entire Pinterest page   dedicated to her street combing finds.  Tara does quite a bit of street combing and has the most interesting and beautiful displays of what she finds.  Goodness, I can for sure admit that I too am a street comber and for sure a sea comber. I find peace and comfort in collecting sea shells, sea glass and bits of goodness I find here or there. I’m not afraid to get my hands dirty, that’s what soap and water are for!

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Aside from finding street treasures and making art out of it, I also have a past of wrapping gifts inexpensively but this (big confession) is mostly due to the cheap skate in me. Yeah, I really have a hard time buying pretty ribbons and papers for wrapping, although I admire them very much. Very, very much. My mama in fact is the best wrapper of gifts I have ever been exposed to. She wraps up gifts so beautiful they are hard to open because you know, I don’t want to ruin her master piece.

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My new creative friends have inspired me to start street combing and bring in more than my feathers, so watch out.  Below is what I collected in about five minutes just by walking across the street from my house this afternoon.  I’m thrilled that even that crumpled piece of yellow paper resembles a heart without any of my manipulation.

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littlest and only teenaged girl

Abbie arrives

It did happen over night you know.  She went from the tiniest little girl and next thing I knew….she was a teenager.  My youngest, my littlest and only girl is officially 13 as of 8:15 p.m. last night.  This Sunday’s  film will be about her birthday.  We celebrated by going to breakfast as a family, then she had another party to attend, another March 8th baby.

2006 Abbie

I wanted to make her 13th day special so while she was at the other party I filled up balloons for her room and each of us in the family wrote her 5 notes and stuck them inside the balloons.  she got her ballet shoes so she can dance like she loves  and we finished our night with sushi.  It was a good day.  A really good day.  I think what meant a whole lot to Abbie was, that her oldest brother made sure to be a part of breakfast and dinner.

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abbie dance

The strange part about being thirteen is, she woke up like an instant teenager.  She was grumpy and silent all the way to school.  I suppose the time change might have something to do with it too.  I know I don’t want to go to bed at night and I sure don’t want to get up in the morning.  It gets me for the first week or so.  Looking forward to the longer feeling days though.

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She is a darling young woman, she has the sweet gene.  She has a tender heart, she is meek, she is mild, she is fun, she is silly, she is quiet, she is humble, she has joy in her heart and she loves Jesus with her entire being.  In so many ways she is a reflection of myself.  I watch her and it’s like I’m watching myself grow up again.  She and I have so many similarities it’s crazy.  She has a blend of me and Rich.  She looks an awful lot like her daddy but sometimes she looks like me too.  Mostly…her handsome daddy though.  She is a gift to us, a blessing and I’m ready.  I’m ready for this next phase.  The little phase was tremendous but we must solider on…move forward and face the future.

my sign reads….”walk on me” I”m trying to re-paint over it.

What kind of person are you? Like if you were to describe yourself, what would you say? Think about it. Would you say one thing, the thing that is true but secretly maybe wish you were another way?

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I’m being honest here. I sometimes want to be more selfish. But I’m not built that way. Instead I may commit to things so that I can help others out. But what it does for me is put a little more stress and pressure on my plate. And every so often I have to let someone down. I wonder why I’m so accommodating in the first place? It’s like I put the little rug down and it has words on it….”walk on me” Naturally people do, they walk on it/me. It’s my message. Only I can re-write my message. But I don’t.

I have heard from people I love, people who want to fix things that I should just NOT say yes to things so much of the time. My answer usually goes something like this “well, if it were the other way around and I needed help, I would hope someone may be able to help me the way I’m helping them” But the real truth is this. There are givers and there are takers. The givers give and the takers take. The takers don’t typically give back. They have figured out what works for them. The givers, they keep giving until they just feel tired and maybe even a little sad too.

IMG_1968 Me trying to illistrate the point.  behind the scenes.  Hey what’s up Pablo!

One of my friends said this “she would even give you the skirt off her body” this is true. I have given two of my favorite skirts away because I found two people who didn’t own a skirt. I wanted them to twirl with me so I gave them something to twirl in. This is not to toot my own horn, this is to explain that this is how I am. If you came into my house and said something like “I really love that cup, it’s so cute” I may just say “here have it, I got some joy out of it, now it’s your turn” I’m a giver. I give. I often even feel uncomfortable if I receive. Yet I also know a lot of really amazing givers I really adore my giver friends and in the world I live in, I’m lucky there are more givers than takers. But just like when I hear one negative thing and nine positive things…somehow I focus and obsess on that one negative thing rather than embrace those nine positive things. And when I have one taker and nine givers, I focus on the taker. I just do. I allow the taker to steal my joy. Only I can hold tight to my joy. But I don’t.

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oh hey Pablo!

I’m 44 years now on this earth and still I grow and I learn and I don’t change as fast and as much as I would like but I’m at the very least acknowledging my shortcomings and trying to work them out. I suppose I’m not claiming to want to be a taker. However I do want to be strong enough to say no when it matters, when my sanity, when my rest and when my worry will be less with a few more No’s. Can one say No, without feeling selfish? I wonder if I can get to that point to realize my health, my life and my sanity is worth a few No’s.

IMG_1972hello, can you two stand on my back for a second.  “oh sure mom” no questions, I love that. 

just cause I like to write words

This morning when I woke up.  Rich left a pretty big, big red rose from our garden next to my morning coffee.  It made me smile right off the bat.  I feel so blessed to have this guy as my partner.  I wonder what I did to deserve it? I never want to take him for granted. When I tried to capture a shadow this morning,  I put his rose in front of an outlet, see there.  That’s the morning rose.  It’s like a double cool thing.  It’s grandpa’s rose and Rich knows how special they are to me.

FullSizeRender (1)I wore another of my skirts today!  I thought my friend KATE would really like this one.  motorcycle man says it looks like a C.D. and wants to know what song it plays but us hippie girls know it as tie dye! And when I went to the post office today, I passed a gal who smiled big and said “I love your skirt!”  That was nice and naturally I smiled back BIG and said “THANK YOU!”

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A few other blessings!  Papa gave motorcycle man his shoe shine kit and old tool box.  My sister Sarah fixed a bracelet I had that I really loved and I’m wearing it above in that picture.  My friend SunDaizy dedicated beautiful words to me today and made a picture mosaic of us.   If I were tech-ie enough I would copy the mosaic and show you here.  But I couldn’t figure it out.  I saw a few shadows today and reflections too.  I vacuumed the max hair and kitty kat hair all up, lit some candles, did the dishes, washed our towels and now I sit here to write.  I promised myself and sister Sarah bunny yoga would happen.  So I will end my day with that.  How was your day?

the hours 2014

hours year 2014

Last year I was invited to a shared blog called the hours the whole purpose of the blog was to bring a group of ladies together from all around the world and each of us would post one photo a month beginning at 7 a.m. in January and ending at 6 p.m. in December.  If you were to ask me if I had a favorite hour or month I will tell you it was December at 6 p.m. this group of collective photos was pure magic!  I don’t like to shoot after dark without a flash, I just don’t feel very good about it and especially being indoors but then it ends up being my favorite hour.  My favorite month.  It had a quality of magic as I mentioned and also qualities of joy and peace amongst a little hustle and bustle that the season can bring and some spirits too, in the form of some cocktails.

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The hours is going for another round in 2015.  I have decided to stick with it.  Why?  Because is pushes me to try new things, it has me learning too.  Many of the women and now a few men even are always open to share their knowledge.  I will miss some of the gals who decided not to give it another year but I understand and respect their reasons.  On the flip side I’m excited to meet a few new photographers, rub elbows with some familiar old friends and also be in the presence of some mind-blowing talent.  I sort of wonder how a hacker like me even ended up there, however variety is the spice of life and I do bring variety and I’m going to be content and comfortable in my own way of contributing to this year-long project.  Again honored and feeling blessed to be there.  I hope you might follow us this year, see who is new and what we all come up in the hours of our days from month to month.  I used to tag all my pictures Los Angeles because I live less than 20 miles from our City of Angels and I do live in Los Angeles County but I decided this year to keep it completely accurate and state that I’m from a little tiny city in L.A. County called La Mirada because that’s where most likely I will be shooting my hours….unless I get adventurous and leave my little city, then I will note otherwise.

What projects will you be doing in 2015?  Do you have a word? My word is Balance, let’s hope I can balance my hours, it’s quite manageable really and also balance the year-long video time capsule class I’m being taught by Xanthe Berkeley who…..is also in the hours this year! I’m also going to continue a shared blog with my friend Christina at 22limes and our friend from the UK Debs where we will be “shooting with soul”  We haven’t quite figured out our kinks on that one but we will be going through this book by Alessandra Cave for the entire year of 2015.  It’s always good to keep learning, to keep stretching and to stay creative if that is where you heart is.  I will begin my first 8 weeks of 2015 in a more spiritual way with class made available by Jeanne Oliver called Becoming, it’s an 8 week study that’s absolutely free if you might also be interested.

Wishing you a healthy 2015 in body, mind and spirit