It’s true you know. Like yesterday for instance. I nearly had a melt down and bought a gallon of ice cream when the dresses I was trying on looked so horrible on what I thought was my new and improved body. So I did what every social media junkie does. I posted my frustration. And then do you know what happened? A flood of positive feed back came in. Friends even suggested things I could wear, some friends even offered their own clothes. And in the end I realized it doesn’t matter what my body looks like, people don’t even see that. They see ME. I had just been taught the very same lesson I was teaching my girl the very day before as she was curled in a ball on her bed, crying because nothing looked good on her and her body was not “perfect” it’s not like “her friends” I told her this and I’m not even sure if I said the right thing or not. I said “Abbie, sometimes my clothes don’t fit right and I feel yucky and I compare myself to my skinny friends, and then I realize my body is good, I can walk and I can jump and I can swim, I also know that my friends/family see me different from how I see myself, they see joy and love and they see straight through to my insides and they love me for exactly who I am and Abbie, that’s how I see you! I see you as a beautiful girl with a big, big heart full of love and joy and so you radiate by just being you” And then alas the very next day….I try on dresses and have a melt down. Sigh….being human can be such a challenge. But when I’m down God always seems to send the perfect people to cheer me up. So we keep going, each day we just keep going. Like “The Little Engine that Could”
and when you have that attitude of I can and you just keep trying then eventually you will reach your goal. So I’m not giving up and I’m going to continue to encourage my girl and show her how gorgeous she is by being who God created her to be, full of light, love and joy, with a pretty singing voice and sparkly eyes and she has the gift of touch and love, she gives the best hugs. Pretty soon, she will believe it too.
Already middle of the week! I just wanted to share a few things. LOVE. I will begin with LOVE. This is not original to me, I was not the first person to spot hearts in all sorts of places. Lots of people do this especially in the community I spend time in. I have met so many wonderful people who also can spot a heart, which I call love in the most unusual spots. I don’t think finding hearts (love) should be exclusive to just one person, my hope is that this will spread, that lots of people will begin to find hearts, little gifts of love in their lives. It just takes a little paying attention and you will begin to see them. You will begin to see so many it will feel trippy. I get so excited when someone finds a heart and shares it with me. Just yesterday I was cleaning out my purse and I had a crumpled up cup from Trader Joe’s that I had sampled their coffee in. Abbie spotted the heart right away and asked if I had taken a picture of it yet? I had not noticed it yet, but she sure did. Here or there friends and family have texted me, or tagged me on Facebook when they find a heart to share. I get thrilled every single time this happens. I don’t think I will ever tire of it. I encourage you to find the gifts in your day-to-day, the little bits of love left just for you.
My fitness goal has been going pretty well. My first day of fit camp was on June 26th I’m certain at that time I was still around or close to that weight I posted a picture of two weeks prior at 179. But by the time I had my first measurements which was a little over two weeks later I weighed in at 177. That was when I also found out my body is 59 years old! Again, what the what??? When this Friday rolls around I get to see if I have improved over the course of 4 weeks. I didn’t start drinking a shake for breakfast until after July 4th so I count my beginning as pretty much the beginning of July. I like to round things it makes it easier to remember. This way at the start of each month I will see where I’m at. I can share with you that although I have not lost a TON of weight, I feel a difference in my energy level. My insides are beginning to feel stronger. I have been sleeping through the night….well unless Garfunkel messes with my head. (my cat who likes to knead my head at 2:30 a.m.) I can hold a plank for a full minute now, not easily though, I shake, I sweat droplets and I nearly hold my breath until the minutes is up, I need to work on breathing, keeping my head up but I can hold that minute. I can’t wait to hold it with more grace though. Still pumped, have the best support from my family and friends and health coaches with Activate. I hope to show you all that with obedience, endurance and faithfulness, hard work and all that good stuff that anything is possible. It’s up to me. I watched the best video yesterday, these words caught my full attention “Get up, look up and never give up” I’m writing it on my front door. (done) I need to SEE things. I have words all around our house. I’m a word girl, can you tell? Written that is. I’m pretty quiet otherwise;)