I’m not sure about you and I can only speak for myself. After having a very fulfilling weekend with close family where insecurities were shared (mine) and life’s little hills and valley’s were talked about, I have decided what would be best for me is to step away from most social media. I find myself wasting too much time checking up on my friends and family. I worry about them, I pray for them, I celebrate with them and I feel compelled to leave notes of encouragement and love to many of my friends and family but this sort of thing takes time, it takes thought and when I do these things I genuinely mean the comments that I leave but at the same time it takes great effort and as a mom, friend, sister, daughter and a few other titles I carry it takes a little something from me (time being the biggest) I find myself comparing my life to this person or that person and this is exactly what we are not supposed to do considering we are all wonderfully made (psalm 139:14) I quite honestly get swept up into this social life that although can be very wonderful, seeing pictures of new babies, and far away family it can take away precocious time. And again I only speak for myself. Others may have a good balance when it comes FB and Instagram and all the other things. I will of course finish my commitment I have with the hours, I will not give up my blog because this is where I grow in my art and in my words. I will also most likely limit my flickr activity although I’m not completely convinced of this. I may just put limits on it which will be easy because I have nearly backed away from it anyway. I want to put more effort into my walking, breathing living life. I want to be able to focus more completely on my children my husband. I want to have more time to sit and read. I want to have more time to wonder around and take photographs of blessings that I find in my day to day existence. I want more time to focus on my Creator. I want more time to exercise, more time to just be. This is what I have decided and rather than just pull the plug without words or explanation. I decided to make the general announcement. And still silly of me to think it even matters to any of you that this would be what I have decided. If I have a real live relationship, you already have my email address, or my cell phone or my home address.
I hope to grow during this very long break. I hope to believe in my abilities and stop comparing my words, my art, my life to anyone else but my own. And as I like to say, the choice is mine, I just have to be brave enough to make it. There is so much to see and do, so much life to be lived and shared.
And lastly, you have to know there is a part of me who feels guilty and selfish for doing this because it shouldn’t be all about me and what I want and desire but if I could only explain my heart in a more clear way. It will mean I write more real letters, exchange real emails make more phone calls and just be in the world the way we used to exist. It felt so much simpler then. I’m not dropping the people I love and have established relationships with….. I’m just stepping away from the online stuff.